(Mostly) unsexy men who would make divine best friends.


James Taylor. Putting aside Mr. Taylor's supposed mental struggle early in his life, he seems like the coolest cat on the block. Especially when he was living in London, cavorting with the Beatles, and released the first non-Beatle album on Apple Records. He looked undeniably cool on the cover of his debut album. Then he moved back to America, and released some of the greatest music of the time. Also, Thanksgiving with James Taylor and Carly Simon kind of sounds fun.


Martin Scorsese, the ultimate unsexy best friend candidate. Marty just exudes this intelligent, laid back, I'll-teach-you-about-cool-stuff-without-being-cocky air. He seems to know a little bit about everything, and is just waiting for an opportunity to talk about the Red Shoes, the blues, and Ingmar Bergman.


David Crosby. I'm sure anyone who just read those words is going, "what the fuck?" I adore David Crosby, plain and simple. Before picking up his autobiography, I just thought he was a man with a sweet voice and a nasty drug addiction. He is supposedly a resident of my town, according to quite a few townies, but I have yet to see him. My mother did though, buying peanut butter and fishing rods.


Brian Jones. Now, Brian Jones is an exception to the unsexy rule. I'm not attracted to him, even in the slightest way. He just seems like an amazingly interesting character, with gorgeous flamboyant style. Brian Jones is the pseudo-gay friend that most girls wish to have. He is the rare man, that isn't a boyfriend, that girls would wish to share clothes with. Had I had the pleasure, I would've asked Brian for fashion advice every day. Everyone says Anita Pallenberg created his style (Keith's as well), but I'd say they all equally influenced each other. He had an ear for music, and could quickly learn how to play any instrument handed to him. Brian Jones was a majestic storybook character.


Any and all members of the Band. Just another opportunity to show lovely photographs, because that's all it takes to show what incredible friends they'd make. Oh and, they are definitely not unsexy.


Ric Ocasek. I really don't know why I like Ric Ocasek, but I do. He seems fun, even if he ranked #50 on the Boston Phoenix list of the 100 unsexiest men in the world. That's why he is on this list! I like him, I like the Cars, and I like him with Paulina Porizkova. And he makes a wonderful producer. His name is fun too.


Mick Fleetwood. I can't say I find Mick Fleetwood unsexy. He has an odd charm, that most people shun. So maybe Mick Fleetwood can be the best friend you incidentally fall in love with. (Stevie Nicks did!) He has a crazed look in his eye, and I want to know why.


Bob Dylan. The other day while in the car listening to Bob, I turned to my cousin and said "I want Bob Dylan to be like my psychologist, except I don't have to pay him." I suppose a simpler way to put it would be to say I want Bob Dylan to be my confidante, but I liked the former much better. I see past Bob's stupid facade. He is simply a scrawny, Jewish boy from Minnesota who knows how to cleverly piece words together. I'd just like him to cleverly piece words together for me, when I am in need.


F. Scott Fitzgerald. I wanted an odd non-musician to break the pattern, so I chose Mr. Fitzgerald. He seemed like a lost, wounded bird who spoke frankly and honestly, but in a meek way. At least that is how Hemingway painted him in A Moveable Feast. Just to see him randomly spew out gorgeous words in conversation, and to comfort him when his marriage was in a bad way. Because obviously he wasn't always that way, before Zelda, he was seemingly normal. Maybe Hemingway just made it that way because he and Zelda clearly did not get along, but it shows in the overall history of F. Scott Fitzgerald. "His talent was as natural as the pattern that was made by the dust on a butterfly's wings. At one time he understood it no more than the butterfly did and he did not know when it was brushed or marred. Later he became conscious of his damaged wings and their construction and he learned to think and could not fly any more because the love of flight was gone and he could only remember when it had been effortless."


Dennis Wilson, my favorite Beach Boy. One night during conversation someone said "Who really even knows all of the Beach Boys by name?" I tried my best, but came up a couple short. So that night I did my Beach Boys research, found out all of their names, their background stories, and decided my favorite was drummer Dennis Wilson. He is probably best known for housing the Manson family before the Cielo Drive murders. I like Dennis because he seemed to be a smart, fun loving man. Very quotable-- "Fear is nothing but awareness. I was only frightened as a child because I did not understand fear – the dark, being lost, what was under the bed! It came from within." "I give everything I have away. What I am wearing and what’s in that suitcase is it. I don’t even have a car. I have a 1934 Dodge pick-up truck which someone gave me. I could have anything I want. I just have to go out and get it. If it’s worth having, it’s worth giving. The smile you send out will return to you!" I just love the second quote. The fact that Dennis picked up those hitchhikers and sheltered the Manson family shows his wonderful character. He cared for these people who he hardly knew at all, simply because he knew they needed it. How much Dennis knew about the murders is unknown. "I know why Charles Manson did what he did. Someday, I'll tell the world. I'll write a book and explain why he did it. Over the years, people have always wanted to know what happened, what my relationship with Charlie was. We were just friends." He also had a relationship with Fleetwood Mac badass, Christine McVie. It turned out that he was a little too eccentric for Ms McVie, and they ended their relationship. Dennis faced his death by an alcohol-related drowning in Marina Del Ray on December 28, 1983.



Jeff Lynne, the teddybear-looking genius behind ELO. Listen to the detail on any of ELO's records, listen to his fantastic production on any album he has produced. Look at his amazing beard! His voice is just glorious. I just love Jeff Lynne. I saw him one night in Hollywood, and my heart was beating so incredibly fast.