Ryan Dosier - Greetings, Muppet fans! It's that time of year again--Halloween is coming, and coming fast. Yes, it's time for dentists to break out the new drills and put a down-payment on that brand new yacht, time for girls to wear an outfit in public that consists of less than they wear to bed, and time for small children to dress up as their favorite cartoons, super heroes, and teenage pop stars!
But what is an adult Muppet fan like you (or I) to do at this festive time of year when everywhere we see Darth Vader costumes or his-and-her electrical outlet and plug costumes? How do we, the Muppet fans, show our love for Muppets, Sesame Street, and Fraggle Rock on Halloween? Well, lucky for you, we here at The Muppet Mindset have a look into some of the new, official Muppet costumes available through Sesame Workshop and The Jim Henson Company this year.
As you surely recall, last year we featured a similar two-part series of articles looking at the Muppet costumes from The Muppets Studio and the Sesame Street costumes from Sesame Workshop. These costumes were ranked in three categories: Character Likeness, Fun Factor, and Scare Factor. Each factor will receive a rating of up to five stars to help you determine whether it's worth your purchasing.
Today we're looking at costumes from Sesame Workshop as we see their attempts to appeal to college-aged girls (which is exactly who I'm trying to appeal to). Let's get started, shall we?
SEXY COOKIE MONSTER COSTUME - $50.00
LIKENESS - Ah, yes, everyone's favorite Sesame Street character: Sexy Cookie Monster. Riddle me this, Sesame Workshop, what on earth makes a preschool character with googly eyes who spends all of his time eating sexy? I mean, besides the girl in the costume... But honestly, is it really a good idea to produce costumes of your characters that encourage girls to dress like this? Isn't that kind of the opposite of your curriculum? Just wondering. Get back to me on that. The worst part is, it looks nothing like Cookie Monster! Kudos on the cookie-shaped belt buckle, though. 1 STAR
FUN FACTOR - I guess this depends on what sort of fun you want to have. 3 STARS
SCARE FACTOR - The only thing scary about this costume, to me, is the fact that someone at Sesame Workshop approved this and thought it was a good idea. "Yes, yes! Let's whore out our beloved children's characters for 'sexy' costumes. What could parent groups possibly have against that?" However, there is nothing scary about the girl within the costume. Call me, Sexy Cookie Monster girl! 3 STARS
SEXY ELMO COSTUME - $39.99
LIKENESS - Umm... likeness of what? Elmo? A girl wrapped in a red towel and wearing red stockings? Someone with an Elmo-looking alien eating through their skull from the inside out? Honestly... with the right amount of orange ribbon and a fluffy enough red towel, you could probably make this costume for about $10. Incidentally, about $10 is probably all this girl plans to spend on Halloween--guys like me will be buying her all the drinks she wants. 1 STAR
FUN FACTOR - Who wouldn't want to tickle that Elmo? 3 STARS
SCARE FACTOR - Once again... frightening that this was allowed to happen, but I certainly wouldn't mind being in Elmo's World for awhile. And really, there are so many other sexy Sesame costumes they would be much scarier to parental groups... 2 STARS
SEXY BIG BIRD COSTUME - $39.99
LIKENESS - Well... it is feathery... sort of. And I rather like what they did with the legs--they should've done that for the adult Big Bird Costume from last year! I cant' see the weird Big Bird thing on her head... but I just have to assume that it doesn't look anything like Big Bird. However... it's a cute blonde in a Big Bird costume. Isn't that the dream, fellas? 2 STARS
FUN FACTOR - Just tune me out for a minute here, ladies... Think of the possibilities, guys! She goes as Big Bird, you go as Snuffy--"Don't worry baby, I'm not imaginary." So many great pick up lines too... "Hey, can I buy you a bird seed milkshake?" "What say you and me go say the Alphabet later? Maybe we can put U and I together." ...And I wonder why I can't pick up girls. Okay girls, you're welcome to tune in again. 4 STARS
SCARE FACTOR - Big Bird... the face of Sesame Street for 41 years... reduced to a cute blonde girl in a frilly yellow towel with orange and pink striped leggings. Well... if she's giving me her phone number I guess that's okay. 2 STARS
BIG BIRD TODDLER COSTUME - $39.99
LIKENESS - See! SEE?! Now THIS is a costume! Adorable, acceptable, and well done. Some great Big Bird-like pants--even better with the orange sneakers--a fantastic Big Bird hat... now see, this is a costume I can support. I guess it just shows that Sesame Street costumes always work better on kids. Even the likeness of Big Bird is good enough that I can't really even complain! 4 STARS
FUN FACTOR - What kid doesn't want to be Big Bird for a day? Bonus points for parents who put their kids on stilts to make them as tall as Big Bird. Less bonus points if said parents end up with kids in the hospital on Halloween due to falling from stilts. 3 STARS
SCARE FACTOR - There is absolutely nothing scary about this costume. Wait... I take that back. It's scary to think that one day this little girl might wear the Sexy Big Bird costume. *shudder* 1 STAR
ABBY CADABBY DELUXE COSTUME - $44.99
LIKENESS - Everybody say it with me now... "Awww!!!" Alright, now that we have that out of our systems... How great is this costume? It even comes with Abby hair! This is adorable and I can't imagine any little girl not wanting to be Abby Cadabby for Halloween. They get to carry a wand, they get to have wings, they get to have awesome Abby hair, they get to turn things into pumpkins... Win! 5 STARS
FUN FACTOR - To quote Abby... "[This costume] is so magic!" Look at that! The girl in the picture is already having fun--and she's not even trick or treating yet (presumably)! If you can figure out a way to rig your little fairy-godchild on some sort of rope or other hanging object so that she could actually fly like Abby, more power to you! (Please don't do that.) 4 STARS
SCARE FACTOR - The only way for this Abby costume to be scary is if someone other than a little girl was wearing it. Yes, I'm looking at you Joe Hennes from ToughPigs! Don't get any ideas! 1 STAR
And with that, I bid you farewell until Part 2 of our Muppet costume spotlight. Next time we'll look at too-hideous-to-be-real Fraggle costumes. Trust me... you won't want to miss this. Look for it on Tuesday!
To see all of the Sesame Street costumes and merchandise available for Halloween this year, be sure to check out the online Sesame Street store!
The Muppet Mindset by Ryan Dosier